00:52:34 · Parag Agrawal, Molly O'Shea
[00:52:34] S2: My wife is, her name is Vinita. I was an engineer at Twitter when we got to know each other. So if you think of the part of my career where I've done well that people know about, It's mostly her. She is a superwoman. She is hyper ambitious. And I was ambitious, but I think she has driven my ambition even higher. Like, I have always aspired to be the top X in the world at anything I do. That's the only way. I was driven to do that for math, I was driven to do that for physics, I was driven to do that for computer science research. And I think I got there for all of those. But I don't think I would have thought I was capable of this until she pushed me. And then I was like, yeah, I think if you care enough about something, I think you can go become top 10 in the world at anything. Now the top one is a whole different field. But I think, for me, it's like the standard setter is my wife. She is a physician. She practices still. She is an investor at Andreessen Horowitz. She's done a startup. She does healthcare. She does biotech. She works really hard and is an amazing mom and wife. [00:54:23] S1: That's amazing. So you guys have a nice little competitive dynamic. [00:54:26] S2: Yes. Yes. Yes. I think I am privileged that when I go to a lot of things, like people use me to access her. [00:54:35] S1: Really? [00:54:36] S2: Oh, all the time. Like, people will come to me to figure out how to get me to forward an email to her.
00:54:36 · Parag Agrawal, Molly O'Shea
[00:54:36] S2: Oh, all the time. Like, people will come to me to figure out how to get me to forward an email to her. [00:54:42] S1: Oh my gosh. That's amazing. Well, that's a really great call out. I wasn't expecting that. Why do you think partner selection or who you choose as a partner is so important?
00:54:42 · Molly O'Shea, Parag Agrawal
[00:54:42] S1: Oh my gosh. That's amazing. Well, that's a really great call out. I wasn't expecting that. Why do you think partner selection or who you choose as a partner is so important? [00:54:53] S2: I thought probably the most important decision in life. And like you, as you said, right, like you... Your peer group, like I was fortunate growing up to have like a really crazy, weird outlier of a peer group. Like all of my friends were essentially kids of nuclear scientists in India. And everyone was like, Okay, I'm going to be the best at whatever we try to be. And so there was this ambitioncompetitive expectation all around. And so if you surround yourself, and then I went to college, and my college was the most competitive. And I went to grad school, was the most competitive. So you surround yourself in that and like you kind of surprise yourself by being around high expectations. So when you... Like this is what now everyone's talking about, right? Like you build a team, you have high talent density, it's a superpower. If you don't hire outliers, you don't get outliers. If you hire only outliers, you get only outliers. There's a lot of self selection that happens. I've been fortunate to go through that journey and been like, I got started in life with that kind of peer group. And then you kind of won't ever let yourself not be in that peer group. And that percolates into like your partner selection, which then further drives things. So it's like kind of a self fulfilling prophecy of sorts.
00:54:53 · Parag Agrawal, Molly O'Shea
[00:54:53] S2: I thought probably the most important decision in life. And like you, as you said, right, like you... Your peer group, like I was fortunate growing up to have like a really crazy, weird outlier of a peer group. Like all of my friends were essentially kids of nuclear scientists in India. And everyone was like, Okay, I'm going to be the best at whatever we try to be. And so there was this ambitioncompetitive expectation all around. And so if you surround yourself, and then I went to college, and my college was the most competitive. And I went to grad school, was the most competitive. So you surround yourself in that and like you kind of surprise yourself by being around high expectations. So when you... Like this is what now everyone's talking about, right? Like you build a team, you have high talent density, it's a superpower. If you don't hire outliers, you don't get outliers. If you hire only outliers, you get only outliers. There's a lot of self selection that happens. I've been fortunate to go through that journey and been like, I got started in life with that kind of peer group. And then you kind of won't ever let yourself not be in that peer group. And that percolates into like your partner selection, which then further drives things. So it's like kind of a self fulfilling prophecy of sorts. [00:56:26] S1: In such a competitive career in every stage, how do you not break from the pressure? What pressure? You don't feel pressure? No. No? Why? Why would I? A lot of people do.
00:56:26 · Molly O'Shea, Parag Agrawal
[00:56:26] S1: In such a competitive career in every stage, how do you not break from the pressure? What pressure? You don't feel pressure? No. No? Why? Why would I? A lot of people do. [00:56:45] S2: Yeah, I think it's kind of a made up thing. Right? I really believe that. Like, I think I, through the Twitter acquisition, I used to track my sleep score. [00:57:00] S1: Really?
00:57:00 · Molly O'Shea, Parag Agrawal
[00:57:00] S1: Really? [00:57:01] S2: And I was sleeping fine. I think if you know what you must do, you do it. You don't have to feel pressured. Like the world can come at you. But if you know what you're capable of and you have a slightly long term view, like everything is a week or a month. So you don't have to feel pressure. You have to perform every day, which is a completely different thing. So now the core question you have to ask is, there are moments where you must feel pressured to perform. So I really like feeling insecure is my word. Really? Which is I have... I've always told people that I only want jobs, which I wouldn't hire myself for. So I want somehow to feel that someone's thrown me into a challenge that on paper, I'm not supposed to be able to accomplish. One that drives you to be slightly humble. Two it makes you little bit paranoid. It makes you want to learn things and makes you curious and it makes you work really hard and it makes you seek help. If you feel secure in what you are doing, it doesn't drive any of the most important behaviours in my experience. So, pressure is a different word because it suggests that you are trying to meet somebody else's expectations, instead of your own. And I think internal expectations are way way way better drivers of success than external ones. And at least for me, I would say other than my wife, my expectations have always been higher than the world's expectations off of me. Even from like true believers, like who believed in me.